"Do not give birth after forty" & nbsp
In forty years, as you know, life is just beginning.
What does it mean? Yes, everything is the same: your children, born in their twenties, are already adults. Well, or almost adults. Your career took place. There is where to live, where to go to rest. He still does not pull to the ground with terrible force – this is when obtrusive advertising, according to your previous inquiries, begins to give you only information about greenhouses, feeding tomatoes and black currant saplings.
You are aware of fashionable novelties, you have a “shatush” in your hair, skillfully masking the few gray hairs that have suddenly appeared, but strangers call you to the still tender “girl”.
Whether the girl, and whether a vision.
Great age! You can fall in love, you can go on a weekend somewhere … to Prague or to the sea, you can go and learn how to dance Latina. Or tango. You do not need to do homework with children after work, and in the morning cook them porridge and rush to school with a forgotten shift. Moreover, the bonus: adult children, having had a teenage maximalism, become your friends and helpers. Both your own parents are alive and relatively healthy. Not life, but a fairy tale.
And here, it is not known why, covers. I want a baby, defenseless, tiny! Pink heels, milky smell, diapers, bibs, first tooth, first step, again everything is new. Not only joy, mind you. And also children's diseases, kindergarten, school, then – everywhere. And your “new little one” will go to school, but you already have half a year. And by the end of school – under sixty. Yes, yes, I know that today's forty is thirty yesterday, so say sociologists, explaining that in cities the “sense of age” has decreased by ten years. In a sense, at thirty now the world perception and appearance as at twenty, and at forty – as in "thirty of yesterday." But the strength is no longer becoming. And health does not grow stronger.
At forty, you have to rejoice that you are “again a girl,” living a very interesting story. Well, or at least "woman-berry." Cheerful and workable. Live this period – up to your grandchildren – as a segment of life, when you can finally find out a very interesting person: yourself. During the period of a crazy race from twenty to forty, few people can afford to do what they want …
We obey all the time to circumstances, family responsibilities, becoming in a career … This is also great, but at forty you suddenly realize that it’s not done so much for yourself! So many films and books, cities and countries, the joys of large and small remained somewhere over the horizon. And here is an opportunity for you to learn all this.
But we are not accustomed to living "for ourselves." And the woman becomes obsessed with the idea of giving birth at any cost. About happy motherhood at the age of "forty plus" we are broadcast "stars". Malikov – gave birth! Lera Kudryavtseva called her daughter Masha! Nastya Zavorotnyuk also became a happy mother at the age of 48, and Pugacheva, that one in general … Lisa and Harry no longer leave the pages of the press. But think that there are mostly babysitters involved in the baby. And the money is different: well, the “stars” do not sit on sleepless nights above the cradle. Yes, and they give birth, mostly surrogate mothers.
Like much of what we see, motherhood is a beautiful, pastoral picture for gloss. No more.
The propaganda of late childbirth has played a bad joke with women of the metropolis: many dream of a baby, and, moreover, modern medicine can provide this baby. But here, alas, there is no longer any strength left for his feeding and upbringing. Yes, and the health of the woman later birth does not add.
I'm not talking about any special cases when a woman had no children under forty, and suddenly there was an opportunity to give birth. I say – about the very standard and common situation where a woman has already completed her mother program on time, and then suddenly, bored for some reason, or after succumbing to advertising, she wanted a “late babe”.
Wait out a little, dear "adult girls." Very soon you will have grandchildren – and you will be able to give them everything that your generous and beautiful soul yearns for. To love a tiny creature, to give him warmth and affection. Only – as a grandmother.
The opinion of the author of the column may not coincide with the point of view of the editors.