Guy walks into a bar jokes

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Guy walks into a bar jokes deals with topics that are considered to be in poor taste or overly vulgar by the prevailing morals in a culture. His friend says “DUDE Thats awesome!

The guy says “It was a glass table. Daddy, what are those two spiders doing,” she asked? What do you call the spider on top,” she asked? A Daddy Longlegs,” her father answered. So, the other one is a Mommy Longlegs,” the little girl asked? As his heart soared with the joy of such a cute and innocent question he replied, “No dear.

Both of them are Daddy Longlegs. The little girl, looking a little puzzled, thought for a moment, then lifted her foot and stomped them flat. Well,” she said, “that may be OK in California, but we’re not having any of that crap here in Texas. Why are there gates around the cemetery? Because people are dying to get in. A guy walks into a pharmacy and buys a pack of condoms.

The cashier asks him if he wants a bag. He responds, “No, she’s not that ugly. Q: Why don’t witches wear underwear? A: For a better grip on there broomstick! Put your finger in me” she asks him. So he does without hesitation, as she starts moaning. Put two fingers in”, she says.

She’s really starting to get worked up when she says,”Put your whole hand in! So he has his entire hand in, when she says moaning aloud “Put both your hands inside of me! So the guy puts both of his hands in! A shepherd goes to a television programme.

A man of the viewers stand up and asks him, “What was the best day of your life? A second man of the viewers asks him, “And the second best day of your life? So, after that, a third man of the viewers stand up and asks, “And the worse day of your life? A man walks into his house with a duck under his arm.

His wife says, “That’s a duck. He quickly replies, “I wasn’t talking to you. A rabbi, a priest, and a Lutheran minister walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, “Is this some kind of joke? A screwdriver walks into a bar.

The bartender says, “Hey, we have a drink named after you! The Screwdriver responds, “You have a drink named Murray? Guy walks into a bar and sits at a table. Tells the waitress, “I’ll have a Bloody Mary and a menu. When she returns with his drink, he asks “Still servin’ breakfast?

When she says Yes, he replies, “Then I’ll have two eggs-runny on top and burnt on the bottom, five strips of bacon ON END-well done on one end and still raw on the other, two pieces of burnt toast and a cold cup of coffee. A panda walks into a bar and orders a beer and a hamburger. After he eats he stands up stretches and pulls out a gun shooting everyone in the room but the bartender. 20 on the bar and turns to leave. As he walks out the door the bartender asks why the panda shot everyone.