How to avoid mistakes in communicating with the children of her husband from his first marriage
Forming a couple in adulthood, many women are faced with the fact that the spouse already has children from their first marriage, with whom they need to somehow build relationships.
There are 5 most common mistakes. How to avoid them and properly behave with children, advises a psychologist.
1. Aloof attitude. With all your appearance you show that they are indifferent to you and are not interesting, let know that they are not welcome in the house. It is clear that you will not love other children like yours, but think about it: they are the children of your loved one, his family. He left his wife, but they still need him. Try not to build barriers in communication, behave naturally. And if you do not have any warm feelings towards children, then try to behave yourself at least neutral friendly.
2. Lecturing Of course, you want to share your experience and knowledge with the younger generation, but you should be aware that they already have at least two people who need to communicate the rules of behavior to them. Just tell your doubts about upbringing to your spouse or his ex-wife, but not in the form of a remark or admonition. In the end, you wouldn't like it either, if you were lecturing with lectures.
3. Do not try to replace parents. Do not compete in cooking, attitude and pastime with a real mom. Such behavior can be interpreted absolutely wrong. Do you like children? Great, just remember that you are just the father's new wife, and no one will replace the mother.
4. Cheating. Very ugly on the part of women looks like a deception of children that dad is not at home or he left for a month. Your desire to be alone with a partner is normal. But do not forget about the right of children to their own father. Also, do not try to win their favor by using false compliments. Children are very sensitive and recognize the falsity behind your words.
5. Irritability. You should not recoup on children, behave with dignity. To ruin a relationship is very simple – just one careless word, and never again find a common language. Keep your feelings (especially negative) under control.