How to talk with a teenager
Every parent knows that the time will come when his cute angel will grow to puberty and much can change.
It is no secret that parents and teachers can not always find the key to problem children. When guys are in their teens, they are not only restructuring the body and a surge of hormones. There is a revaluation of all values and the birth of a new adult person. In order not to complicate the already difficult period of a child’s life, it’s worth remembering a few simple tips for communicating with adolescent children:
1. The position of the teacher.
It is a bad idea to try to put pressure on a teenager with his authority and lecture him. At best, he will miss the information past his ears, at worst – he will do everything exactly the opposite.
2. The position of the prosecutor.
You can not start a conversation with the prosecution: this way you will immediately turn the child against yourself. He is unlikely to want to listen to the information, no matter how valuable it is, if you conduct a dialogue with him from the position of the prosecutor. This will cause a feeling of protest and the teenager will do everything in his own way.
3. Do not be a "distant ancestor."
If you have not mastered modern technology, then it's time to start. Communicate with the child in his format, in his comfort zone. This will help him to open up without fear of being misunderstood and rejected, as is often the case with ordinary verbal conversation.
4. Do not use the word "never."
You also get annoyed when your boss says: "You can never do anything right!" Or when a loved one declares: "I have never been important to you!". All the wording of your thoughts, seasoned with the word "never" are doomed not to fly to the consciousness of the interlocutor. In a child, you will only cause offense and aggression.
5. Do not allow yourself to scream.
You probably guess that you are only crying out your impotence? This is the most unacceptable form of communication with a child in transitional age. They do not take the screaming person seriously, because they think that he has no arguments other than hysteria.
6. Do not panic
A serious mistake of adults is hyperbolization of ordinary things. Did you find out that your daughter has a boyfriend? You shouldn’t press a girl talking about “it’s too early for me to become a grandmother. Children are uncomfortable to talk in this way.